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A few days ago a friend posted a story of a little girl on Facebook. She got a remark on her report card from the teacher about not always being “present” in class and class activities. Not that she wasn’t physically there, just that she wasn’t always paying attention. She was sad about this comment until her mom told her it was okay because she was a “noticer”. She noticed when people were hurt and upset, and noticed when the dog had a runny nose that turned out to be a problem. She noticed when people like her grandfather were slower than the rest and hung back to walk with them. She noticed everything and that was a gift. I too am one of these people. I am conscious of every little detail. Within the first few minutes of being with someone, I can tell you what their hair looked like, the shirt and pants and shoes they were wearing, their makeup and jewelry and the color of their eyes. I can also tell you the vibes coming off them and the emotion behind the face they are presenting to the world. I notice everything. Whether it is true that this is a gift or not, I’m not sure. In our case, it causes great anxiety for me on occasion. I notice if Mark’s limp is more pronounced, or if his breathing is different. I notice if his hand trembles a little more than normal, or if sometimes when the brain is swelling he isn’t quite present in his eyes. But then I also notice if he is walking and talking even slightly better or if he is a little more relaxed than yesterday or a little less angry or depressed.
As I am a noticer, Mark is not. Mark gets noticed. Mark has always gotten noticed. I imagine even when he was little people gave him a little more attention than they did others. Then when he was out of school and got the band together he was getting noticed. He went on tour around the country and got noticed everywhere. He played guitar and sang and did perfect tributes and impersonations of Chuck Berry, Jimmy Hendrix, Buddy Holly and many more. He got noticed. He played everywhere and at some wonderful places. He played for big name people. He got noticed. When he quit that band and came home to be a dad and a husband, he played in bands here in town and he still got noticed. When he started working with me at Richards Music he got noticed. He isn’t even a little bit of a noticer. He can’t tell you much about a person he was just with or how they were feeling. He doesn’t notice if I am sick unless it is painfully obvious and he doesn’t notice if I change my hair. He doesn’t notice what mood I am in unless I am screaming at him.
A noticer very rarely gets noticed and one who gets noticed is very rarely a noticer. I think most couples are made up of one of each. The funny thing is that while the noticer may long to be noticed even once in a while, the one who is noticed doesn’t ever long to be a noticer. The one who is noticed is used to being noticed and the noticer is used to not being noticed. To use us as an example, Mark being used to being noticed has always spent way more time in front of the mirror than I do. He has cared way more about his hair and clothes than I do. He doesn’t wish it to be any other way.
I secretly long to be noticed. I want to write a book that people notice and have it become popular. I want people to notice my crocheted items and designs and the things I create and love them and find they can’t live without them. I want someone to notice that I have beautiful hazel eyes that hide a lot of pain and sadness. I want someone to notice that this situation is hard for me too. I’m sure it isn’t half as hard as what he is going through, but it is still hard. I want someone to notice that while I may not be the best step mother or wife or daughter or caretaker, that I am doing the best I can and not failing at any of the above. I want someone to notice that I am here too and have ideas and feelings. Even for five minutes.
Being a noticer is a gift. You can bring happiness to the sad and help to the sick. You can see the beauty in everything. You can also see the pain and ugliness and try to change it.
Being noticed is a gift. You can do things and change things and give to the world things that people notice. You can bring things to the attention of others and be an agent of change that people will pay attention to.
I believe we all need to try to be a little bit more of each thing. Instead of being one or the other, we need more of a balance. The noticer needs to be noticed once in a while and the one who is noticed needs to pay more attention and notice more things. I think with more of this balance there would be a lot less pain and depression. My Soul is groaning from being more balance.
Father, tonight I pray that we are more balanced. Help me to be able to be noticed a little more and help Mark to be a little more of a noticer. Please give us good healthy rest this night. Please keep me free from fear and anxiety and anger and nightmares. Please make Mark feel better and more relaxed tomorrow. Please make whatever is going on with my stomach and head to stop. Please take moms swelling and anxiety away and give her a good night’s rest. Please make this arctic freeze go away. Please keep Merlin healthy and happy. Watch over our family and friends. Heal the sick and see to each one according to their needs. I pray they all have a relationship with You if they don’t already. Please keep all the young ones safe and well. Watch over our soldiers far from home. Please make all of us be a little more of a noticer to help those who have need of being noticed. I thank You for giving me this gift. I thank You for being here even though I don’t deserve it and haven’t always thought I needed You. I thank You for seeing to our needs and for the blessings and beauty that is around us every day. I praise You and give You glory and honor. I love You.
Amen
As I am a noticer, Mark is not. Mark gets noticed. Mark has always gotten noticed. I imagine even when he was little people gave him a little more attention than they did others. Then when he was out of school and got the band together he was getting noticed. He went on tour around the country and got noticed everywhere. He played guitar and sang and did perfect tributes and impersonations of Chuck Berry, Jimmy Hendrix, Buddy Holly and many more. He got noticed. He played everywhere and at some wonderful places. He played for big name people. He got noticed. When he quit that band and came home to be a dad and a husband, he played in bands here in town and he still got noticed. When he started working with me at Richards Music he got noticed. He isn’t even a little bit of a noticer. He can’t tell you much about a person he was just with or how they were feeling. He doesn’t notice if I am sick unless it is painfully obvious and he doesn’t notice if I change my hair. He doesn’t notice what mood I am in unless I am screaming at him.
A noticer very rarely gets noticed and one who gets noticed is very rarely a noticer. I think most couples are made up of one of each. The funny thing is that while the noticer may long to be noticed even once in a while, the one who is noticed doesn’t ever long to be a noticer. The one who is noticed is used to being noticed and the noticer is used to not being noticed. To use us as an example, Mark being used to being noticed has always spent way more time in front of the mirror than I do. He has cared way more about his hair and clothes than I do. He doesn’t wish it to be any other way.
I secretly long to be noticed. I want to write a book that people notice and have it become popular. I want people to notice my crocheted items and designs and the things I create and love them and find they can’t live without them. I want someone to notice that I have beautiful hazel eyes that hide a lot of pain and sadness. I want someone to notice that this situation is hard for me too. I’m sure it isn’t half as hard as what he is going through, but it is still hard. I want someone to notice that while I may not be the best step mother or wife or daughter or caretaker, that I am doing the best I can and not failing at any of the above. I want someone to notice that I am here too and have ideas and feelings. Even for five minutes.
Being a noticer is a gift. You can bring happiness to the sad and help to the sick. You can see the beauty in everything. You can also see the pain and ugliness and try to change it.
Being noticed is a gift. You can do things and change things and give to the world things that people notice. You can bring things to the attention of others and be an agent of change that people will pay attention to.
I believe we all need to try to be a little bit more of each thing. Instead of being one or the other, we need more of a balance. The noticer needs to be noticed once in a while and the one who is noticed needs to pay more attention and notice more things. I think with more of this balance there would be a lot less pain and depression. My Soul is groaning from being more balance.
Father, tonight I pray that we are more balanced. Help me to be able to be noticed a little more and help Mark to be a little more of a noticer. Please give us good healthy rest this night. Please keep me free from fear and anxiety and anger and nightmares. Please make Mark feel better and more relaxed tomorrow. Please make whatever is going on with my stomach and head to stop. Please take moms swelling and anxiety away and give her a good night’s rest. Please make this arctic freeze go away. Please keep Merlin healthy and happy. Watch over our family and friends. Heal the sick and see to each one according to their needs. I pray they all have a relationship with You if they don’t already. Please keep all the young ones safe and well. Watch over our soldiers far from home. Please make all of us be a little more of a noticer to help those who have need of being noticed. I thank You for giving me this gift. I thank You for being here even though I don’t deserve it and haven’t always thought I needed You. I thank You for seeing to our needs and for the blessings and beauty that is around us every day. I praise You and give You glory and honor. I love You.
Amen
